Today

I’ve been this way all day

Have an awesome weekend love bugs!

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F&ck Cancer

Lately I’ve come to know at least 3 people in my immediate circle that have been diagnosed with different forms of cancer, normal people, fit people, people who are complete and utter health nuts in every aspect of their lives. What gives? I recently had a scare when I noticed an abnormal lump very close to my boob. Now being chesty especially after having kids tends to jack your mammary glands all up and you can every now and then feel a little weirdness in  or around your jugs but this little fella was tricky, one day it would be there, the next day it wouldn’t, the next day it would reappear and hurt a little, so I started to panic. Scheduled a visit with the doc, Waited 2 hours past my appointment time, by then my nerves are in pieces trying to not to chew my nails down to the cuticle with anxiety. Anyway I get called back and he walks in, my doctor looks like the late George Jefferson so he does his little stroll around the room and he gets right down to business, the examination took like 15 minutes he looks up at me, smiles and says, it’s just a cyst. I could’ve kissed him but im sure that’s frowned upon highly at the VA Medical Center LOL so he’s like yea, I’ll get your surgery scheduled and we’ll get that right on outta there, goodbye. Whew all I could think was thank GOD I mean while in the waiting area  all I could think of was ugh I aint got time for nobody’s chemo and how long did it take me to grow out these beautiful curly tresses of mine? no maam and my babies how would they manage? crazy so anyway, surgery is scheduled for 2 weeks from now, it should be a quick outpatient type of everything goes as planned,but as with any surgery there are always risks not to mention the cyst still needs to be tested to ensure it is in fact non cancerous. I jokingly asked if I could get a boob reduction at no extra cost since they’ll already have a scalpel in hand, he laughed and said “why would you wanna do that”? very well I get it lol..

 

UPDATE **8.28.12**

My mysterious lump turned out to be just a very agitated epidermal cyst, thank God.. life goes on..

Life

10 Things im over

  1. Fast food drive thru worker’s attitudes– ok so like I try not to have an attitude at the drive thru because only God knows what would happen to my food by some disgruntled employee but  regardless, I’ve been encountering a lot of pissy moods lately and I’m a little perturbed as to why.
  2.   This heat- Its hot, I mean its been hot as HELL literally and I’m so over walking in the heat whether its to my vehicle or to a store the first bead of sweat always seems to be tricklin down my sweater pups I hate hate hate boobs and sweat, combine the two and you have one pissed off Dani.. moving on..
  3. Bad breath-  whats the problem? when in doubt don’t speak to someone 4 inches away from their face, why is this ok? why can you not smell the funk you’re emitting from your suck? this is not ok, and as of lately I haven’t been able to hold my tongue on this matter.. at all.
  4. Beyonce stans- I dunno why folks cannot let this girl be, they spent 9 months in her vagina swearing she wasn’t even pregnant, swearing she had a surrogate, swearing her baby was the anti christ, she decides to release pics of the child, omg beyonce is wearing braids God forbid the girl do something normal like wear flats while pushing a stroller, people really need to get a life. Same goes for the KimYE stans!
  5. Duck lips in photos- I don’t know who told women this was sexy, I’ve even witnessed a few guys doing it as well, stop the madness!
  6. Family stick figure stickers on vehicles ughh
  7. Pube like hairs on my food- I can’t even begin to describe what my hunger is like when I leave work for the day, so on my way home I tend to hunt for food, half the time the food makes it home, the other half im stuffin my face while driving with my thighs. But to finally open up your meal and see this curly substance staring back at you? wtf is happening here? are people scratching their crotches then preparing your food? are you wiping my hamburger bun on your jewels then neatly wrapping it up like seriously how does this happen, and don’t tell me it’s not a pube cause I know what pubes look like! *crickets* anyway..
  8. Phony people and brown nosers at work- lmao the fake smiles and hellos… #overit
  9. Laundry- ha! dear future husband, we will have a maid for this sole purpose, that is all.
  10. People who spit publicly- you’re gross and should be stoned to death with fish tank rocks, for women that do it? there’s a special dept in hell for them as well.

Heeere leethard leethard

Sooooooooooo I’ve had this lizard in my house for the past 3 days terrorizing the living fudge out of me! I even named his azz Phillip. Let me tell you about this little bastard. He made his first appearance in my den, sashayed across the hardwood floor like he freakin pays mortgage around here ok? I figured hey let me beat him with a broom then just sweep him outside cause you know that’s the normal thing to do when you’re scared shitless right? Ok whatever, so I hit him once and he sat there like

So I’m pissed right cause like I have better things to do I mean I only came to the kitchen for a bottled water and this freakin Terrorist will not let me be great , so later that eve I go to throw something in the trash can and pick up a piece of mail I had laying on the floor and Lo and freakin behold phillips little green ass is hiding under the envelope I KNOW I peed a little! By this time I’m 100 degrees , I grab the broom and sweep this little turd across the kitchen floor like I was Tiger freakin Woods and he was the million dollar putt. Ok the next morning I go to the fridge, and there is Phillip laying in front of the damn fridge not moving right, so I’m like thank god this bastard is dead, when I come home from work later I will scoop his stupid behind up and put him in the trash. I get home today and I’m looking everywhere for this little idiot. I’m like maybe a spider ate his remains or something right? No. I’m making a tuna sandwich and who is cha cha sliding their Azz across my kitchen floor in slow motion? Yup you guessed it Phillip Sadaam Hussein. At this point I just grabbed the first things in my reach which at the time was a can of W-D 40, a bottle of pinesol and a can of artificial snow flakes (don’t ask) so I throw and spray all this crap on him right now he’s cornered I swear he didn’t even blink once and I’m almost positive he rubbed some pinesol under his armpits. I feel defeated. I’m googling everything about lizards and all these superstitions cause you know us Haitians are superstitious as hell well apparently a lizard in your home means someone’s pregnant. Lmfao chile please I’m thinking *scoff* ain’t nobody even havin sex in this house so it damn sure ain’t me! Although Im so fertile that i gotta take a monthly pregnancy test even if I haven’t had sex that month. Cause I don’t know who looked at me, but anyway here I am terrified to leave my room cause I dunno what phillips status is, if his cousins pepe and juwan came lookin for him, if the combo of wd40, pinesol and artificial snowflakes gave him human strength I mean I just don’t know. My teen isn’t here and he’s the master of this stuff , he just speaks to them and they leave ;(
*sigh*
To be continued..

You are..

Sunday Dinners

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Naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah Sevenyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa bagithi babaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Sunday dinners are rather lame when you aren’t cooking for a family of 4 *sigh* furthermore at least I can be extremely generous with the cayenne pepper today LOL i miss my kiddos! Hope you guys had a great weekend! seems like it just started ;(

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